You had better thumbs up this post.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

Your momma's so old she might die soon.

the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

123 f*ck off

Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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