Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Two baby seals walk into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Have you seen Hellen Kellers mon?... Neither has she

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Watch me shoot you

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Helen Keller say to her mother? Nothing coherent.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

thumb_up thumb_down -6

your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops