How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Pickle

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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