How do you get a clown off a swing? Get a giant scorpion to rape him.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Billy: You're so ugly you made an onion cry! Jack: I'm rubber and you are glue, whatever you say bounces back and sticks to you. Billy was so upset at what he said and decided to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

WHYS S AFRAID OF B CAUSE OF SBB

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why wasn't Will invited to the party? Will has been dead for 3 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was stapled to the head of a penis that belonged to an asian man

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why is Justin bieber gay? Because he is atracted to men

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A priest and a rabbi attempt to take a whale to a bar. But due to the enormous size and the need for water, the whale couldnt come.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a muslim flying a plane> .....a pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

thumb_up thumb_down -16

#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops