What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

what happened to the girl that didn't forward the threatening chain text to ten people? nothing.

A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

Why did the black man fall down? A guy pushed him.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Watch me shoot you

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

A horse walks into a bar and asks the bartender "why the long face?" The bartender replies "this is the fourth time this week a horse walked into my bar and every time it happened i have to clean up a bunch of horse pooh!"

A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

nolan is gay

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

why was the black man on the bus? cause he needed to get to work

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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