A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

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That`s my friends phone, I can call you from mine too if you want, please just don't hurt me, let me speak to you, I promise I will explain everything.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

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99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

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4 gay men walked into a bar. it was a gay bar. all 4 men had a good time

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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