Why did the chicken cross the road? Scientists are still unable to fully understand the brain functioning of chickens enough to comprehend their motives for doing such a thing.

What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

Why could'nt Susie talk? The mafia cut out her tounge

Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

What did one blind person say to the other? Nothing. He is also mute.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

What did little Timmy find at the bottom of the well? The fact that he could no longer breathe and thus causing him to drown.

how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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