Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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Whats funnier than Dane Cook. The Holocaust.

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

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Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

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what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

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What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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