What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

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What's black, white and sings the intro theme song for "Thomas the Tank Engine" while tap-dancing? There probably isn't anything that does that.

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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What did the book say to it's reader? What are you stupid? People who read can't hear!

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

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What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

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guess what>? your mum lol

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

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What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

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What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

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Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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In Soviet Russia, it is usually cold throughout the year, as it is located in a colder region of the planet.

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Male leadership.

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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