A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

Knock knock It's open, come in

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

I have read the terms and conditions

What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

What's the best use for a van full of candy? Donating it to an orphanage.

What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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