A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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Once there was a girl named Andrea

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Ahmed walks into Abbar. He apologized and they both continued about their jobs as sales assistants at Pottery Barn.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Where is Tampa Bay, Florida?

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

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What did the black man do for his science project Which is better homemade or colonel sanders?

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

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How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

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Dwight Howard

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops