I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

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Whose your daddy? Not me

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ERROR 3045: This joke has gone bankrupt and Is laying in the hospital//:: THE CAUSE: OBAMA CARE

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What did the Republican say after he got off the ferris wheel but before he went on the roller coaster? "Boy, that ferris wheel sure was fun! Now I will ride the roller coaster!"

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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:y do people talk? ;idk :oh then nevermind

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

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"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

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How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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how do you win a game try your best

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust? What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

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What's long,black and wrapped in something yellow ?? A twix

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? numerous abusive terms as you kickk him to death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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