Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

You tell me. I have amnesia.

What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

What's brown and sticky? Feces.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

A guy walks into a bar and falls.

Hey

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

How many Santa Clauses does it take to change a light bulb? Santa Claus isn't real.

What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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