Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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Pickles

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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"Hey have you seen Stevie wonders car. Neither has he.

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women's rights

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Presents.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Doesn't matter get in the van.

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Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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Dumbledore dies.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

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What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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