What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

Two Irish men walk in to a bar. Or maybe it was three. It's actually quite a common occurrence here in Dublin.

1 tip for a flat belly so eating so much u fat bitch

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was jewish and saw a nickel on the other side

What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

Do you know why the kid jumped down the 50 foot hole? I dont know, jump in and ask him.

The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

Why did the child not go to his mother's funeral? He was adopted, he didn't know his real mom.

Why does Joel's breathe smell?

How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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