A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

roses are black violets are black i am blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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