A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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So a seal walks into a club.

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You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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taking out the trash... at night

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Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

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Why did Hitler shoot himself He saw his his gas bill

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

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whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

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Q: Why did they laugh at the black guy? A: He told a funny joke.

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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