When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Dude man, I'm high...

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I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

knock knock go away

Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

What's brown and sticky A stick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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