What happened to the twins? 9/11

I used to have an ugly,black and disabled man as a friend. However, he had a very nasty personality so we are no longer friends.

what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

What did one penguin say to the other? Flippty-flop-dop-boop-de-bop. Jazzhands.

roses are red violets are blue i smell meth abkfjbekfhbkfsdshjfbkhb

Knock Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

Its a long story, I got two balance nerves, I technically got four ear drums (relax you cant see it nor anything,neither can doctors without weird unpleasant stuff), I got about twice the number of synapses as regular people, and well, that makes me pretty damn good at some things, and a total retard at others.

Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

There were three men named manner, poop, and shut up. they all were mad fun of in middle school and ended up hating their parents for giving them such retarded names.

Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My dick

Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

Roses are Dead, Voilets are, too Now shut up and say nothing Because we're watching you

A dog is always in the pushup position.

What's worse than find ten babies in a trash can? Find a baby in ten trash cans.

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

Why was the blonde so dumb? Because she came from a very poor family and could not afford a decent education

roses are grey violets are grey i am a dog woof woof

AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...