Knock Knock Who's there? Eric, your old high school pal! Eric, you slept with my wife 3 years ago. You have her, please stop coming to my door and please stop saying your my pal. Pals don't sleep with other guys' wives.

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

What Do call a dog with an e A doge

What do we call Osama? Osama

How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

Whats funny? Your face.

you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

Two Black Males walk into a bar. A white old lady leaves cautiously. Everyone else stays and has a great time with them as they are actually two very good guys, and funny too.

roses are dead violets are gross guess what i'm in your closet

What's worse than a bad joke? A joke that end's mid sente--

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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