what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

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What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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What's black, hairy, and full of hate? Hitler's moustache.

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How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

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Q: Why did Hitler Kill himself? A: Because his wife couldn't match the pleasure of his massive Nazi Orgies

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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roses are refds violet are xaflj;k it sucks having turretts syndroewe

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops