wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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how do you know if an asian gang has been to your house? 1. your computer is unplugged 2. your homework is finished 3. they are still trying to back out of the driveway

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Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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