Johnny has 32 cookies. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes, Johnny has diabetes.

How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

Have you seen the movie "Gay Men Say No"? Oh yes, that is very insightful documentary on the modern day struggles of homosexuality.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

A- Why did the chicken cross the road? B- I honestly do not care.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

Whats long, black, and fat? The line at KFC

how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

What's sad about three black men in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? They were my friends.

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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