Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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all your base are belong to mark

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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