Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

yo mama is so hairy she has afros on her nipples

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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