What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

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What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

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Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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\ \ \\ \\ >\/ 7 _.-(6' \ (=__._/` \ ) \ | / / | / > / j < _\ _.-' : ``. \ r=._\ `. \ > ,.-' >.'

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Yo momma's so stupid, she got a moderately low score on her SATs, and sadly, was not excepted by any colleges she applied to, and never got a job. This is why she became depressed, and resorted to suicide to escape the growing pain.

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"I see!" said the blind man, as he picked up a saw and hammer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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A man walks into a bar, He is a severe alcoholic and is slowly drowning himself in booze. The man exits the bar after several hours of heavy drinking and walks home. He enters his home to discover a man in bed with his wife. After the first ten seconds of paralyzing rage, he grabs a .44 Magnum and brutally murders his wife and her bed mate. The man realizes he has woken up his two month old, and after thinking of the horrible act he has committed, he promptly raises the pistol to his temple and pulls the trigger. Oh, I almost forgot, the man was schizophrenic and has never been married.

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks what he'd like. The man says something funny, but you kinda had to be there.

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How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ...because chickens love to confound people.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops