What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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What did the Chinese man say to the Japanese man Nothing as they have never met

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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knock knock go away

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

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My Nan, that is all.

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your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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