Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

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PENIS lol

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WHY DID THE MAN FART HE WAS A FARTY PANTS AND WE CAN CHAT HERE ON THIS WEB GO TO ANTI JOKE SEE ME I WILL GIVE U JOKES

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What did the pineapple say to the orange? Nothing; Neither a pineapple nor an orange contains the necessary muscles to produce speech.

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whats black and large -me

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yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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