Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

thumb_up thumb_down -18

This winter: "The seal is broken, as the spirits of hell go across the world, I can help you find them Clint! But only you can prevent them from killing your family!" "I will do whatever I must!" "Be careful, you can only see them with medication sample X, and destroy them with the super addictive Meladocs 5" "HOW DO I KILL THEM! I CANNOT HANDLE MORE MELADOCS 5! ITS ADDICTIVE AS HELL!" "Only you can save us Clint, only you can do this until their world malfunctions saving us all, but killing you in the process!" "I WILL... I CAN!... UGH... HOW MUCH LONGEEEEEEEEEEEEER!" THE PACKMAN: THE MOVIE.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call an arab ?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -18

knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's more likely to happen in 2011 than the rapture? Finding my real parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why was kade sad? he shit himself

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I HATE GEORGE LOPEZ

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops