What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Adam Fantuzzi's just jealous because he'll never be the man his mother is

Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

Your mama is so fat. Just look at her.

What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

When life throws you melons, You probably won't catch them.

What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

What did Osama Bin-Laden say on 9/11? JENGA!!!!

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

Q: What cant you give a black guy? A: Black eye, lips, and a jon

Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? Two piles of dead babies.

The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

What is a mexican's favorite sport? Soccer, it is the national sport of mexico

How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

WNBA

What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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