What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a nest of worms in your apple.

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer? Ask her.

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What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: A bush, have you ever been dragged through one? It hurts.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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Q: Buttsex? A: Butsex!

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A: Knock Knock B: 7

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guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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