Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

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How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

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1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 24

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

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Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

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what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

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Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

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Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

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no rasist joks

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Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

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melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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like if your cool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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