Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

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Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

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osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

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whatis worse then tripping over and landing head first in dog shit No alot

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What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

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there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

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What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Q)what do you call a homless a man ?? A) dunno ask him what his name it (LOL RANDOMZZZ)

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What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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What did one planet say to the other? Nothing. Space is a vacuum in which sound cannot propagate due to the absence of a matter or particle medium.

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A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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Whats the sad thing about 4 black guys going over a cliff in a car? It was my car!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops