Judge: Why did you hit your wife with a hockey stick, Mr. Johnson? Mr. Johnson: My father and mother were mutually abusive when I grew up. As you may have guessed, this gave me a skewed view of the dynamics between husband and wife, as well as causing me to hide my emotions from myself as a defense mechanism. As a sociopath, I feel no remorse for this occurrence.

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what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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- Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Repeat falls off, who's left? - Pete? - F**k yes.

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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"Smithers, I'm home!" "What, already?" "Yes."

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is alive. What's worse than that? He's eating his way out. What's worse than that? He came back for seconds.

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What's the difference between a park bench and a hobo? The park bench can support a family

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Osama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8-9-10.

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Your dad got tired while running, so he stopped running.

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Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

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why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops