What's white and black? Color blind.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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24

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

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whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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You wanna hear a touching story? Once a pon a time you died. The end. (all anti jokes posted by me will be adressed with -blarg)

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So you have been really stressed lately huh?

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

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This will be the least popular anti-joke. Dislike this joke.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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what's worse than dropping half your sandwich? Getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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