Why did the chicken cross the road? He actaully never did. He only made it half way before a cop issued him with an infringement notice for jaywalking.

Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

You know what's funny? You got AIDs

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

Penis

My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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