A Jew and a German meet by chance in a bar. They exchange pleasantries and order drinks. At the end of the evening they leave, having made a friend.

Q: Why is it funny to laugh at gay men? A: They like men.

What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Hey, you must be a parking ticket. Because you are on the windshield of my car.

Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

A rabbai , a mexican , and a ginger are In a car going over a cliff. Which one dies? Who cares?

A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

What do you give a black man for his Christmas? A gift that you feel would suit his personality so that he may draw enjoyment from said gift.

The duck didn't cross the road.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

Your mom is over the average weight for a person of here height and age.

A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

I was watching Fox news.

What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

Jamie Oliver eats a chip

Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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