a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen and warns him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and otherwise damaging consequences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why is this anti-joke here? Because someone submitted it to this website.

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What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

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Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

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my computer teacher just left the room. teehee JLR

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two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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A teacher tells one of her students, "If I say 'I am beautiful', which tense is that?" The student tells her, "Didn't your mother ever tell you that lying is bad?"

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anti jokes are really funny

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

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what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

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Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

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Why was the cat in the bag? Because it's owner was abusive and put it in there.

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

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your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

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What body part did German prince Heinrich von Missingpenis lack? His toenail.

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a fridge halfway through walking.

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Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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