READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

A man with a broken arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I broke my arm, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." Then there is silence and a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone the guy says "I shot in the air and my friend heard it and moved. I think he's still alive." The operator says "Good that means he's still breathing and he's not dead."

mat (telling anti joke): so you are stranded in a desert, right and kyle: no. Mat: no man i'm Kyle: no (kyle was later found dead)

Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

whats worse then finding a bad antijoke on this site? finding a real joke on this site

Why did the black man steal the mountain bike? He didn't. He purchased and payed for the mountain bike.

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

what's black and can't swim?

Cosmopolitan magazine releases an issue without any sex tips.

whats brown and booky a book.

What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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