A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

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WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

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why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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Heeeheeeerrrrrrrrrrr

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An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

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Guys are like a sax. If no sound comes out, you're probably not blowing hard enough.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Cuz he is blind You illiterate uneducated racist bastard trying to say it was because he was black.

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If a plane crashes on the boarder of Canada and The U.S.A- Where would they burry the survivors.

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why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot, racist.

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Click here for free sandwich.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

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Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

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I can't hear you. I have carrots in my ears.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops