What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

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one stop shop

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

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ermm Hello ? what about me says rishi with a tear down his eye

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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So a guy walks in to a bar.... and orders a beer.

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why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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