What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

A Black Man Walks Into an Office For A Job Interview. The Meeting Goes Very And He Soon Has A Very Nice Steady Job.

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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