what did jacob say to coach a joke

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Justin Beiber

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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What happened to the child who was rushed into hospital with a deadly disease? He pulled through. I'ts depressing to be constantly hearing sad anti jokes, so here is a nice one. The child in question lived to eighty one, had a great life and a good job. See, it's nice to read a happy anti joke!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? no... Well, It's really nice. :)

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

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Your friend says "Hi" What do you say back? You say "chunky salsa?" She said "what?" You think she knows you made out with her boyfriend last night. So... You blurt out " I'm SO sorry I made out with your boyfriend lastnight" Know.... Your dead meat.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Dead.

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Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

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Whats worst than being raped by a black guy? Being raped by two black guys? You racist i'm calling the police.

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Why was timmy live on the streets? His parents didnt have the money to abort him!! HaHa

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Multi Orgasmic Pillow screechers

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What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

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An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

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How do you get a black guy to stop hanging around in your front yard? Hang him in the back yard.

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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roses are red violet are blue what are you gonna do when chuck norris find you

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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