How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

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some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Its very nice.

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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What did one elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. Elephants don't talk.

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What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

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A women left the kitchen.

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your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

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What did the little boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's jewish

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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