What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

How do you enter a gas station? Through the front door

Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

Obama lin Baden.

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? The sandwich is hidden under the couch, and is non-migratory.

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

Why did the camel cross the road? He was off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of OZ.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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