Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

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What's worse then having your wife leaving you? Taking the kids with her.

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

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knock knock? Whos there? a questionable person. What? exactly.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why suck a long face the horse shits on the floor and walks out

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

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An englishman, an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar. They were all lawyers out on lunch break and happened to walk into the same building. They laughed about the coincidence over the a drink

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Microwave

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Why cant Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukaemia.

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Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

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Why was the man burying his child? because in france, fishing is only allowed 3 times a day

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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Roses are Razzmatazz Violets are Arsenic These colors are weird Cancer.

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you tell if an albino baby is black? Check his genetics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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