why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

Why did the camel cross the road? He was off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of OZ.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

I'm HIV positive.

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "Damn, it's getting hot in here." The other muffing replies "Holy Shit! A Talking Muffin!"

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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