What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

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why did the jewish man die answer The hollucost

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

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A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

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Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

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Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

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Here come the elephants over the hill!

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What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a convicted rapist.

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

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Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops