I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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i went to the bar. soon after i entered the bar i got kicked out. why? becuase i'm seventeen.

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Chris Brown can do no wrong. False he acquired several wrongs through his mistreatment of several women.

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whats black, white, and bloody all over? i don't know, but we should stop making jokes and help it already.

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What did the cookie monster eat? Food

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

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There are two fish in a tank and one says to the other, "how do we drive this thing?"

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, that's why I was asking.

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What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

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catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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