Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

Have you heard the one about the dead guy? Neither has he.

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

Charles missed the stop sign. Charles can't read.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year old's? I am twenty one and prefer older ladies as I find them more experienced and mature.

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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