Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first moneky.. Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game.. Why did the 4th monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure..

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Q: What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? A: I don't know; I was too busy trying to find my camera.

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Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

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Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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You are like really sincere aren't you? I really appreciate that in a friend. Thank you for being who you are Nero.

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What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

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How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

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THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

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What's worse than walking into your parents room while their have sex? Getting no-scoped by zzirgrizz

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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