what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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What do you call a man who shoots someone? A very bad person.

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what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

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What is the last bit of snow to fall from the sky called? Nothing. Meteorologists have not come up with a scientific term for this phenomenon.

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

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What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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How did the black kid apply for college? The Common App. Duhh

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a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

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How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

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Why does Joel's breathe smell?

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops